I cannot believe Curvy Kate’s audacity to outright steal the work of a high school student for some insipid marketing message.
Shame on you, Curvy Kate. Shame on you.
Original image via: Rosea Posey
SIGNAL BOOST RIP THEM A NEW ONE TUMBLR!
Not only steal the artwork, but steal it for the purpose of denigrating its message.
“being falsely accused of rape is trauma on par with being raped”
okay, I’m done with reddit for today
Uh it can be, a guy goes to jail for false accusations then gets raped himself? It ruins his life, gives everyone doubt to his character? Yeah. Selfish bitch much?
except most rapists don’t go to jail? And even if he did, being false accused isn’t the trauma it’s BEING RAPED. So that would still be different.
And can we just STOP comparing traumas to each other? No one ever wins. It isn’t selfish to recognize two different traumas are just that - DIFFERENT.
Also - actual rape is way more common than false accusations. There is a special type of trauma of existing in a rape culture that tells you it is your fault vs. a world that is quick to defend and support someone who is outed as a rapist.
It’s exactly what it sounds like, folks
A California appeals court has overturned the rape conviction of a man accused of sneaking into an 18-year-old woman’s bedroom and having sex with her while pretending to be her boyfriend. The decision turned on a crucial fact: she wasn’t married.
In the unanimous decision, the court cited an 1872 law that says a suspect is only guilty of rape if the victim is married and the attacker is pretending to be the spouse. In this case, the accused, Julio Morales, pretended to be her boyfriend.
The 18-year-old woman, who had been sleeping, at first consented to sex, thinking she was with her boyfriend. But according to reports, when she realized his true identity she pushed him away. Morales was convicted of rape and sentenced to three years in prison. That conviction has been tossed out and the appeals court says the accused should be retried with prosecutors focusing on another rape law.
Here’s a White House petition demanding the case be tried by a higher court, as opposed to Steubenville’s small-town corrupt juvenile court.
Sign the petition!
Oh, you got raped? Well, that sucks. Are you sure you didn’t ask for it? What’s that, you’re pregnant cause of it? Well, you shouldn’t have had sex! No, you can’t abort the baby. That’s wrong. Congrats you gave birth to a kid! Wait, you don’t have the money to provide for it? Well why did you have a kid? You want us to help? You lazy bum, get a job. Oh, you have one but they didn’t give you maternal leave so you had to quit? Well good, why should you get maternal leave anyway? Don’t act so entitled. Know how you can deal with this? Get married. I suggest your rapist.
It’s a shame that we still promote this “men know best for women” rape culture nonsense so avidly throughout our society. We’ve got to change the media and what we are exposing to future generations.
There has been a message “Through a Rapist’s Eyes” circulating tumblr lately. Claiming to expose research findings about what rapists “look for in a potential victim,” the piece seems to come from a place of care to warn women of all the ways they can prevent sexual assault. However, despite this intention, the tips do more to contribute to the myth of stranger rape and victim-blaming (that you are most likely to get raped by a stranger, that a woman can protect herself from rape and that if she fails to do so, it is her fault).
The message sensationalizes rape and plants a seed of fear while ignoring facts such as how stranger rape accounts for 10-20% of all rapes, and how 70-80% of victims know their assailants.¹ The email is actually a hoax that came out in 2001.² But people are still buying into these myths about rape:
1. The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.
I might as well shave off my hair so there’s nothing to grab onto.
2. The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.
Yes, I will wear multiple layers of clothes and put a lock on my pants. Oh wait, but many of them carry scissors around, anyway. So it doesn’t matter what I wear. Wear chain mail, maybe?
3. They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.
Because as a 5’3” petite woman, I am only easily overpowered if I’m not on guard? Rapists don’t have to wait for me to be “off guard” if I already know them. Which, again, will most likely be the case.
4. The number one place women are abducted from / attacked at is grocery store parking lots. Number two is office parking lots/garages. Number three is public restrooms.
So now these public places are places of fear. But I can’t stop myself from using public restrooms, and parking my car in parking lots, can I? Or do I not have a right to use parking lots without fear of being raped? If I choose to live my life according to my right to live it, and not according to fear of rape, does that mean I “asked for it?”
5. The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.
Or he brings a drunk woman into his room and locks the door. Or he continuously feeds a woman alcohol with a room reserved somewhere. But this doesn’t count because she was asking for it, right? And the guy looked like he was her friend. Right? Did I mention that stranger rape accounts for 10-20% of all rapes?
6. If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.
Yes, indeed. Because victims of rape never put up any kind of fight at all. And because those who do, don’t get raped. So why are women still getting sexually assaulted every two minutes in the U.S.?³ Not that the confusion, shame, and shock of being forcibly physically and psychologically degraded by someone I know and trust, not that all of that might impair my ability to “fight.” Of course not.
7. Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.
So it’s up to me to make myself unattractive and not worth a rapist’s time, because rapists can’t help themselves and are lurking behind bushes with crazy eyes looking for the next woman with long hair and loose clothes. Yup, rape doesn’t happen in dorm rooms with friends I go to parties with and are close to me, places and situations where I might want to look and feel attractive. And because, of course, only attractive women get raped (being “worth it,” does that imply that rape is some sort of reward for being valuable?).
These are just some of the 25 safety tips that the article lists. The fact is, most rapists are people we know. They are people in our classrooms, in our dorms and in our families. These acts of rape are premeditated and targeted. Even a stranger looking for women with ponytails and loose clothes sounds like some intentional targeting. They are not out of control, psychotic, and rare aberrations of society who can plead insanity.
People on this campus think about the type of alcoholic drinks to have at parties, how strong they should be, and whether their guests have the right to know what’s in these mixed drinks. They think about giving beer to men and shots to women. They make sure certain people never have an empty cup, and make sure there are empty rooms nearby. They take the absence of a no to mean a yes. The fact that we don’t find these behaviors dangerous or at least questionable speaks to how our society thinks the best way to prevent rape is to give advice to potential victims instead of to potential violators.
If you’re really that concerned about the prevalence of rape (as you should be), then you would be signing up for bystander intervention training to take some concrete action instead of spreading harmful myths or thinking of more ways woman can protect themselves.
And if you’re scared of false accusations (which everyone seems to be afraid of for some reason), here’s something:
“Statistical studies indicate false reports make up 2% or less of the reported cases of sexual assault. This figure is approximately the same for other types of crimes. Only 1 out of 10 rapes are actually reported. Rapes by someone the victim knows are the least likely to be reported.”
People, we need to step it up.
WARNING: this post is going to be oh-so-very-triggery for victims of rape and sexual assault. I am not kidding.
Dear certain conservative politicians:
Hi! I’m a rapist. I’m one of those men who likes to force myself on women without their consent or desire and then batter them sexually. The details of how I do this are not particularly important at the moment — although I love when you try to make distinctions about “forcible rape” or “legitimate rape” because that gives me all sorts of wiggle room — but I will tell you one of the details about why I do it: I like to control women and, also and independently, I like to remind them how little control they have. There’s just something about making the point to a woman that her consent and her control of her own body is not relevant against the need for a man to possess that body and control it that just plain gets me off. A guy’s got needs, you know? And my need is for control. Sweet, sweet control.
So I want to take time out of my schedule to thank you for supporting my right to control a woman’s life, not just when I’m raping her, but for all the rest of her life as well.
Ah, I see by your surprised face that you at the very least claim to have no idea what I’m talking about. Well, here’s the thing. Every time you say “I oppose a woman’s right to abortion, even in cases of rape,” what you’re also saying is “I believe that a man who rapes a woman has more of a right to control a woman’s body and life than that woman does.”
Oh, look. That surprised face again. All right, then. On the chance that you’re not giving me that surprised face just for the sake of public appearances, let me explain it to you, because it’s important for me that you know just how much I appreciate everything you’re doing for me.
Trigger warning: rape and rape culture
The conversation above took place on the wall of the facebook group, Questioning Slutwalk, which describes itself as a page focussed on analysing the motives and impacts of the Slutwalk Campaign. Slutwalk, which originated in Toronto, Canada, is a worldwide civilian-run campaign that targets rape culture and asserts that a person’s dress, occupation, state of intoxication, etc. never makes sex without consent permissible. Please note that this statement is not exclusive to the sexual assault of women by men — it covers the whole spectrum of genders because the issue here is not the gender of the victim: the bottom line is simply that rape is wrong and that we live in a rape culture that affects everyone regardless of gender.
However, instead of creating an open dialogue on the topic it claims to be centred on, the administrator and the group members of Questioning Slutwalk only post articles and commentary of an unforgivable misogynist, rape-apologist, and slut shaming ideology. Questioning Slutwalk has created a rhetoric that (inaccurately) paints the Slutwalk Campaign as a movement that encourages and perpetuates the sexual abuse of men.
Group members outright reject the reasoned opinions of others who try to explain the purpose of Slutwalk, proclaiming them to be female supremacists, misandrists, rape apologists, and deniers of male rape by women. The group members despise women and think little of the notion of female consent, while simultaneously complaining about the oppression of men by women, rape culture as a creation of female supremacists, and the sexual objectification and abuse of men by women.
Now, I will never deny that men get sexually assaulted and raped by women. It is a true piece of information and it is horrific. It is also just as true and horrific a fact as the reality of the sexual assaults and rapes of women by men, or of men by men, or of any other imaginable gender combination. I will never say that the sexual assault of men is not a huge problem; it is extremely underreported and it is traumatising to the victims. That said, I have a serious issue with the way this group conducts itself. The administrator states that the page is supposed to be a safe place for male survivors, but the administrator completely disregards the hostility directed at both women and female survivors (genders that are outside of the binary are completely unaddressed). Male survivors should and need to have a support group, but this is not the group they need. This group simultaneously accuses the entire female population of being predators and attacks female survivors, viciously stating that they deserve sexual assault because of their actions, dress, etc.
This is completely unacceptable.
One cannot claim that the sexual assaults suffered by one specific group is any more traumatic or serious than another’s. While the scale may vary, rape is still rape, and it is a horrible crime that should never be treated with such disrespect.
EDIT: As of this morning, the conversation above has been deleted from Questioning Slutwalk’s page, which, according to Questioning Questioning Slutwalk, is a common occurrence. Additionally, Chandrapal S Bhasker has blocked Sara and left another charming post.
Can you believe fat people? Just existingwilly-nilly all over the place, sometimes without even the courtesy to cloak their terrible bodies in heavy smocks and caftans. Some of them even have the gall to ask to be treated with basic human decency and compassion! Good thing we have Daniel Tosh & Co. to regulate this shit. On Monday, Tosh.0blogger Mike Pomranz posted a photograph of a fat woman wearing a gold bikini and trying to hail a cab in the rain. They framed it as a “caption contest,” inviting readers to submit their most delightful fat-shredding bon mots. Except, oops, the photo wasn’t theirs to post.
It belongs to fat activist and artist Substantia Jones, and is a part of her Adipositivity Project, which seeks to normalize and affirm fat bodies. (Here is the photo in its original context.) Tosh.0 apparently pulled the photo from this website (don’t bother clicking unless you like dumb garbage), which cropped out the link at the bottom. Jones has contacted Comedy Central’s legal department, and as of a few minutes ago the page has been taken down.
“Folks sharing Adipositivity photos,” Jones says, “as is regularly done all over Facebook and Tumblr, aids in the purpose of getting body positive images in front of as many eyes as possible. We dig that. But to steal someone else’s copyrighted material in order to use it in purveying bigotry and hate for profit? Not cool.” The woman in the photo—who, to everyone’s surprise, is an actual human being—is actress/model Janie Martinez. Jones describes the image as “conveying the bliss of being completely happy with your physical self, and boldly so, even in a world filled with ridicule.”
Weirdly, the Tosh.0 commenters took the opposite approach. Before the page was pulled there were over a thousand semi-literate sample captions submitted, including:
Beneath all of that skin is a beautiful vagina, waiting to be fucked….and waiting….and waiting
She’ll get picked up soon, I see a garbage truck coming.
And my personal favorite:
Quick get me to occupy Wall Street, I hear they are raping people down there
In case that last one isn’t clear, it’s implying fat women should be grateful to be raped—eager, even—because it’s obviously the only way their disgusting bodies will ever be touched by a man. Let me repeat. If you rape a fat woman, she will probably thank you for it.
Oh, it’s “just a joke”? Good one. Good joke. It’s almost as good as when businesses “prank” fat people by not hiring them, or insurance companies do this old gag: “Knock knock?” “Who’s there?” “Not fucking health insurance if that’s what you’re looking for, fatty!” Ahhhhhhhh, jokes.
Now, I don’t expect the Tosh.0 blog to be a bastion of intellectualism, but it’s disheartening to see this level of dehumanizing bullshit thriving under the umbrella of Comedy Central. The Daily Show is probably the most compelling and compassionate advocate for critical thinking on television—and the best evidence that you can be funny, political, and scathing without resorting to lazy stereotypes and hate speech. Meanwhile, Comedy Central’s website is actively baiting 14-year-old dumbasses to come up with the cruelest shit possible? Come on, bros. Be better people.
Photo credit: Substantia Jones / Adipositivity Project.
I have always hated this sad excuse for a man
“Have I ever had ‘ANY unwanted/undesired physical or sexual contact’?” - Author Molly talks about the normalization of unwanted contact that doesn’t quite fit the definition of sexual assult, but is nevertheless indicate that “Your body is not for you. Your body is for men’s pleasure.”
The Not Rape Epidemic - On the same vein, Latoya Peterson discusses a lack of discussion over sexual assult that falls outside the ‘stranger hiding in the bushes’ stereotype.
Schrödinger’s Rapist: or a guy’s guide to approaching strange women without being maced - The title says it all: what being hit on feels like from a woman’s perspective, and what men can do to not seem like total creeps.